I've practiced. I can still look with anticipation at the things that are before me. A mild sense of security. No panic needed. No giant fight. No sense of time in unsensabilty. Bruce Banner ladies and gentlemen.
He turns. Like a switch when he gets used to getting what he wants. One fight every four years? Just the word no. I suffer from the same chemical imbalance in sorts. But most don't welcome The ability to self analyze. It happens every time. He gets greedy. Entitled. More selfish. We fight. I resent. We separate. Eventually come back together. And pattern repeated.
I don't have a problem going away. I'm centered. I don't have a problem taking care of business. My kids. Who have been in his life for three years off and on too. I have to be stable. And my life is not a giant party.
The same fight over and over again. And he starts off so cool. Like that guy is out of this world. But watch out when hulk gets mad. Emotionally retarded? Fuck me?
If I love something wouldn't I want it to have the best? If he can do better than me, then he's more than welcome to it? It's his happiness. Love isn't self seeking.
When you're a child you play with childish things, when you grow you put childish things away. I've grown out of these petty quarrels.
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